Most People Live Their Whole Lives Not Knowing This About Themselves
You’ve done the work. You’ve read the books. You’ve taken the tests.
You know your letters. You know your number. You might even know your love language and your dominant strength. You’ve checked all the boxes people said would help you figure yourself out.
And something is still off.
Not dramatically wrong. Just not quite right. Like wearing a coat that almost fits. The job looks fine on paper. The relationships seem okay. But there’s this friction underneath everything. A quiet hum that says, this isn’t quite it.
That friction isn’t a character flaw. It’s information. And most people never learn how to read it.
Here’s what the tests don’t tell you.
They describe you. They don’t reveal you.
There’s a difference between knowing your traits and understanding the energy that actually flows through you. The energy that makes certain things feel effortless. The same energy that makes other things feel like you’re pushing uphill every single day.
I’ve been watching this for over 35 years. I’ve seen the same pattern show up over and over.
When someone finally understands the energy that’s actually moving through them, the friction doesn’t disappear. But it stops being confusing. They stop fighting themselves. They stop wondering why they do things the way they do. They finally have a translation.
I call it ING energy.
It’s not a label. It’s not a category you get sorted into. It’s a verb. It moves. It flows. It shows up in every situation. But it’s always there.
There are seven ING energy types. Let me walk you through all of them. Not so you can pick one right now. But so you can start to feel where you recognize yourself.
- perceive ING notices what other people walk right past. The detail nobody caught. The tension in the room nobody named. The solution hiding in plain sight. If you’ve ever been told you’re too intense or too harsh, that’s perceive ING energy at work.
- serve ING knows what people need before they ask. It anticipates. It fills gaps quietly. If you’re the person everyone leans on and you sometimes wonder who holds you up, that’s serve ING energy.
- teach ING has to understand something completely before it can move on. It breaks things down until they make sense. It can’t stop until it’s clear. If you’ve been told you give too much detail or explain too thoroughly, that’s teach ING energy.
- encourage ING sees what people are capable of before they see it themselves. It believes in potential so strongly it can feel almost inconvenient. If you’re always cheering for others even when you’re exhausted, that’s encourage ING energy.
- give ING thinks about resources. Who has what. Who needs what. How to move things so everyone is taken care of. If you’ve been called too generous and somehow too private at the same time, that’s give ING energy.
- lead ING sees the path before anyone else does. It’s already three steps ahead while everyone else is still reading the map. If you’ve been told to slow down or stop trying to run everything, that’s lead ING energy.
- mercy ING feels what other people feel before they say a word. It sits with people in hard places without needing to fix anything. If you’ve been called too sensitive your whole life, that’s mercy ING energy.
Here’s what I want you to notice.
Every single one of those descriptions included something someone told you was a problem.
Too intense. Too much detail. Too generous. Too sensitive. Too far ahead. Too tuned in.
What if that was never a flaw?
What if the very thing you’ve been trying to dial back is actually the energy you were designed to flow through? That’s what I mean when I say most people live their whole lives not knowing this about themselves. They spend decades managing the thing that is their superpower.
The moment someone recognizes their ING energy is not a loud moment. It’s quiet. It’s the slow exhale of someone who’s been holding their breath for years. One person told me it felt like someone finally helped her translate the way she moves through the world. Another said he finally understood why he does things the way he does.
That’s not a small thing. That’s someone getting their life back.
If something here landed for you, I want to hear about it. Drop a comment and tell me which type made you stop. Tell me what you’ve been told is a problem that might actually be your purpose.
And if you want to know your ING type, there’s a free quiz at ingtypes.com. It takes a few minutes. Read your results slowly. Not to get a label. But to start having a different conversation with yourself.
Your identity IS your purpose. 🤞
Stephanie Mason is the author of 7 ING energy Types: From Quirks to Strengths and the founder of TSMI. She’s been working with people on identity and purpose for over 35 years.